Bruce Campbell! Plus: “Indy… why does the floor… move?”

Okay. The good news is that rumour has it that not only will My Name is Bruce finally get a cinema realese, but it may very well have a sequel.If rumours are to be believed: Hail to the King, baby! If rumours are not to be believed, Hail to the King baby anyway. If you know what I’m talking about, this is probably old news. If you don’t know what I’m talking about stand up right now and walk away from the computer. Pick up your wallet and your keys, get in your car, drive to your local video library, walk up to the counter and say “Hello, sir! May I hire Evil Dead 2: Dead by Dawn” and “Evil Dead 3: Army of Darkness:”? If. in your mind, you are wondering “Why am I hiring sequels to a movie I’ve never seen?”, ignore this. It only seems like rational thought. Take the DVDs and go home. Watch them. Watch them now. And, when you’re done, tell me youre not a monarchist.I dare ya!Anyway. It’s crazy, rambling film-geekery what gets me into the trouble. I was so genuinely hurt by what I saw that I wasn’t really able to approach it as a normal human being with critical faculties intact. It meant too much to me. It was such a part of my childhood that I couldn’t see straight – and maybe I still can’t. So, to wash away the sins of Indy 4, I watched Raiders the other night with a friend. And it was awesome! But not fundamentally as different from the tragedy of Indy 4 as I had imagined.Raiders has all those Spielbergian comedic beats, which date poorly. It has that curious mix of awesome action and silly gags. The fight in the streets of Cairo is played as three quarters clowning around and only one quarter genuine danger, for example. It also has implausible scenes, like the G-men in the first act telling Indy that “this is all strictly confidential” while they happily chat in an enormous echoing lecture-hall.That being said, Raiders is awesome and Crystal Skull is just downright silly. It doesn’t matter that they are built of similar elements – an argument that’s been offered me more than a few times by folks who liked the movie. What does it matter that the elements are the same? Star Wars has the same elements as Phantom Menace. Godfather 3 had all the same elements as Godfather 1. Happy Days still had Fonzie after he jumped the shark.Raiders was awesome and Crystal Skull was terrible.I’m just saying.

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